{"id":5734,"date":"2020-04-27T12:11:47","date_gmt":"2020-04-27T19:11:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/?p=5734"},"modified":"2020-04-27T12:11:47","modified_gmt":"2020-04-27T19:11:47","slug":"where-are-we-to-gowhere-are-we-ever-to-go-day-at-anchor-04-27-2020","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/?p=5734","title":{"rendered":"Where Are We To Go\u2026Where Are We Ever To Go? \u2013 Day\u2026? At Anchor \u2013 [04\/27\/2020]"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"No more questions,
\nNo more tests
\nComes the day you say \u201cwhat for?\u201d
\nPlease\u2026no more..
\n[\u2026.]
\nRunning away, go to it
\nWhere did you have in mind?
\nHave to take care, unless there\u2019s a where
\nYou\u2019ll only be wandering blind
\nJust more questions, different kind
\n~ Into the Woods
\n<\/em>
\nWell, I have begun this entry about 3 times and had to start over because that\u2019s how fast everything changes out here! I am consolidating several days into one entry so bear with me.<\/p>\n

First things first, we are now on the ship of one of our sister lines (different brand, same parent company). We are comfortable and well cared for, and getting<\/em> here was a long and complicated journey (which involved a rather unpleasant few days on one of our other sister ships), including two very uncomfortable very bouncy tender rides.<\/p>\n

You see, we can\u2019t do transfers in port (once again thank you CDC), so the entire repatriation shuffle has to take place off shore. This means that everyone and everything<\/em> has to be ferried by tender back and forth from ship to ship. As far as I know they formed a human chain of sorts to get everyone\u2019s luggage down the stairs and into the tenders and then hopped us in one by one. That first tender ride from our original ship to the intermediate ship? That was scary\u2026we were basically in open ocean, and the ships were miles apart, those were some pretty big waves to be in a boat that tiny! I found myself thinking \u201coh, this is what all of those emergency training exercises are to prepare us for\u201d\u2026<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t think I ever want to see a tender again for a long while.<\/p>\n

We were housed on the intermediate ship for two pretty uncomfortable days. The reason they were so uncomfortable was simply because no one knew we were coming. We had been diverted from our original destination because the seas had gotten too rough for our sister line to continue their tender operations. Because no one knew we were coming, there were no cabins for us for the first hour, no water for the whole first afternoon, no real air conditioning to speak of and we were confined to quarters. I know it was no one\u2019s fault, there are always glitches in operations like this, and the people were very kind to us, but it was probably the most distasteful two days I\u2019ve ever spent onboard a vessel. Hopefully a situation that is not to be repeated any time soon.<\/p>\n

After that we were moved here, to the sister line. The much much<\/em> bigger fancier sister line.<\/p>\n

Now, you would think that everything was all sunshine and roses after that but not so much. There were still a lot of hiccups to be worked out. First, this line\u2019s policy (and who knows, maybe fleet-wide policy by this point) is that spouses are quarantined separately from each other, so \u2013 after months of dealing with this emotional rollercoaster side by side, Amras and I are now in separate living quarters. Needless to say we are not particularly pleased about this. However, the worst of it has been mitigated by the fact that \u2013 since we all came from green ships, we have been stepped down from \u201cquarantine\u201d to \u201cself-isolation\u201d meaning that as long as we keep masks on, we are allowed to leave the cabins for scheduled meal breaks and such. It\u2019s not much, it\u2019s not great, but it\u2019s something at least.<\/p>\n

The people here have been super kind and very accommodating. The spaces are nice and we all have some kind of natural light (those of us who transferred all have verandahs, and I believe many others do as well). The food, now that we no longer have to rely on room service, is excellent. Especially for those of us who have been eating way more Asian style food than we would normally be used to for the last little while. It was a blessing to walk into the buffet line last night and see what I think of as comfort food. And fruit. Lots of fruit. They\u2019ve also given us swag bags with colouring sheets and chocolate and bingo cards and trivia. Really, they\u2019ve been brilliant. We\u2019re super looked after here\u2026<\/p>\n

But\u2026that all said\u2026.it\u2019s really only our location that\u2019s changed.<\/p>\n

As for what all of you may be wondering: I have no idea what happens next or when we\u2019re leaving. As far as I know this is now the \u201cNorth American Hotel Ship\u201d that is just kind of holding onto us until they figure out what to do with us.<\/p>\n

I know that the rest of the fleet \u2013 including our original ship \u2013 have zipped off in different directions to take our crew members from other countries closer to their homes. I will admit, that was a tough one, for over a month we\u2019ve looked out our window and seen the same handful of ships. We\u2019ve become our own little neighbourhood. And we\u2019ve been with the same people onboard. Always the same people. We didn\u2019t always know everyone by name, but we knew all the faces. Truth is, most of us didn\u2019t want to leave any of those people behind. But the only way to get us all home was to split us all up. So now\u2026now, we\u2019re at a different anchorage, and there are far fewer of us and all different. Our nightly chorus of horns is smaller now, I\u2019m actually not even sure that I heard it last night. But then, it was a strange and very busy day, it\u2019s possible that I just wasn\u2019t outside at the right time.<\/p>\n

This ship is much much<\/em> bigger than the ones we are used to. We leave our cabins and I feel like I have to spend about ten minutes just figuring out where to go. We have been welcomed like guests, but we still feel like refugees. Pulled out of our own environment, unsure of what\u2019s happening to us, unsure of where we even belong.<\/p>\n

So, we don\u2019t know.<\/p>\n

I know the CDC is still not allowing any of us entry. I know that there are people fighting for us, and that we are all fighting for each other.<\/p>\n

I know that\u2026this is hard. I know that I am a strong person who right now does not feel strong anymore. I know I feel lost, and frightened and confused. I know I have good days and bad days. I know we all do. I know I would be even more lost if Amras wasn\u2019t at least on the same ship with me even though he\u2019s a hallway apart from where I am right this moment. I know that I have gone through rage, through exhaustion all the way into \u201cI just can\u2019t\u2026\u201d and that it\u2019s taken a while for me to get to that point. I know that I am trying so hard to stay positive and remind myself daily that this will<\/em> end but that I\u2019ve reached the point where I\u2019m saying \u201cI don\u2019t like this ride anymore and I would like to stop now\u201d. And I\u2019m accepting that feeling like that is okay\u2026because I think any sane person in this kind of situation would feel the same. I\u2019m pretty sure that\u2019s what how most of the world is feeling right now.<\/p>\n

But as for the rest of it? As for when any of that will change? I just\u2026don\u2019t know.<\/p>\n

So for now, we\u2019re safe, we\u2019re taken care of, we are fed and entertained\u2026<\/p>\n

We just\u2026don\u2019t know what\u2019s happening to us.<\/p>\n

And for now, that\u2019s our new normal.<\/p>\n

And the one thing I know more than anything else? You\u2019ve still got to be kind babies, you\u2019ve still got<\/em> to be kind<\/p>\n

No more giants, waging war
\nCan\u2019t we just pursue our lives with our children and our wives?
\nTill that happy day arrives how do you ignore?
\nAll the witches? All the curses?
\nAll the wolves, all the lies the false hopes the goodbyes the reverses?
\nAll the wondering what even worse is still in store?
\nAll the children\u2026
\nAll the giants\u2026
\nJust\u2026No More\u2026.<\/p>\n

<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

No more questions, No more tests Comes the day you say \u201cwhat for?\u201d Please\u2026no more.. [\u2026.] Running away, go to it Where did you have in mind? Have to take care, unless there\u2019s a where You\u2019ll only be wandering blind … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[109,4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5734","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-hotel-california-layup-updates","category-below-the-waterline"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3GtNE-1uu","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5734","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5734"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5734\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5736,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5734\/revisions\/5736"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5734"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5734"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5734"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}