{"id":5787,"date":"2020-07-05T11:49:17","date_gmt":"2020-07-05T18:49:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/?p=5787"},"modified":"2020-07-05T11:49:17","modified_gmt":"2020-07-05T18:49:17","slug":"the-length-of-the-race-07-05-2020","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/?p=5787","title":{"rendered":"The Length of the Race \u2013 [07\/05\/2020]"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"Don\u2019t waste your time on jealousy
\nsometimes you\u2019re ahead
\nSometimes you\u2019re behind
\nThe race is long\u2026and in the end? It\u2019s only with yourself.<\/p>\n

Whatever you do, don\u2019t congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else\u2019s<\/em><\/p>\n

~ Everybody\u2019s Free (To Wear Sunscreen)<\/em><\/p>\n

The other day I was standing at the cash register, feeling like any other day. A little grimy, a little tired, and \u2013 these days \u2013 a little lost.\u00a0 But \u2013 for the most part \u2013 fairly normal.<\/p>\n

And in through the door walks an old family acquaintance, the sister of a dear family friend I pretty much grew up with. And she looks basically the same way she always has, but with<\/em> her is this other woman; who looks… perfect. Put together, confident…honestly who looks like the cover of a fashion magazine.<\/p>\n

You remember my daughter don\u2019t you?<\/em><\/p>\n

And I blink. And suddenly, I feel about\u2026.two hundred years old. It\u2019s not jealousy exactly it\u2019s\u2026this bizarre inferiority complex. I remember this girl as being a bratty toddler who annoyed me when I was a tween (I probably have the age difference off there, but it\u2019s what I remember); and now, here she was this\u2026perfect looking girl. Suddenly all these self-doubty thoughts crowded in on me: You\u2019re almost forty and here you are behind this counter, what on earth have you done with your life? Why didn\u2019t you make better choices? Did you even bother to do your hair this morning? Why didn\u2019t\u2026why didn\u2019t\u2026why didn\u2019t.<\/p>\n

Which is so STUPID.<\/p>\n

What have I done with my life? I mean come on! I\u2019ve published three books, I\u2019ve learned countless new hobbies, I had traveled around the world five times before my thirtieth birthday. I\u2019ve stood in the shadow of the pyramids, climbed the great wall of china, I\u2019ve run an entire classroom on my own, I\u2019ve trained other people to do a job that I almost rebuilt from the ground up. I got married, I have a happy relationship. And the only reason I am<\/em> behind that counter is because I have a super strong work ethic that has allowed me to bounce back and forth into retail for over twenty years \u2013 which means I have a strong back up plan for emergencies. It\u2019s not always easy<\/em>, it\u2019s not ideal<\/em>, but it means that in the midst of a global crisis I am in a strong enough and smart enough position to not have be truly afraid \u2013 because<\/em> of the ground work I laid years and years ago. Tired yes, but afraid no.<\/p>\n

So yes, I have accomplished a lot with my life, and I am still <\/em>accomplishing things.<\/p>\n

Comparing myself to this woman, who I no longer even know, and certainly know nothing about is\u2026nonsensical.<\/p>\n

So why do I bring any of this up? Why do I mention this whole silly incident at all? Well, it’s because it taught me something.<\/p>\n

We \u2013 as people \u2013 have a general conditioned tendency to compare ourselves to others, and we usually measure ourselves short. We look at another person and too often see everything that we are not. Everything they have done that we haven\u2019t. That\u2019s\u2026foolish. No matter who you are, there is only one<\/em> you. True, it\u2019s possible \u2013 hell even likely \u2013 that your life hasn\u2019t gone the way you thought, but that doesn\u2019t mean that you are any<\/em> less than anyone else. Your life is your own. Your choices, your accomplishments; and just because those choices and accomplishments are different than someone else\u2019s? It doesn\u2019t mean that you are worth any less, or that you are any less amazing as a person. No matter how broken or battered you are or feel, you are worth something, you matter. What does not matter is what someone else has done with their life; you can\u2019t change that, and you shouldn\u2019t judge yourself because of it.<\/p>\n

In short? Go easy on yourself\u2026<\/p>\n

Remind yourself once in a while that yes, the race is<\/em> long (though not as long as we think), and in the end? It really is<\/em> only with yourself.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Don\u2019t waste your time on jealousy sometimes you\u2019re ahead Sometimes you\u2019re behind The race is long\u2026and in the end? It\u2019s only with yourself. Whatever you do, don\u2019t congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[17,106,21],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5787","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reflections-below-the-waterline","category-sadie","category-vacation"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3GtNE-1vl","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5787","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5787"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5787\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5789,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5787\/revisions\/5789"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5787"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5787"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5787"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}