{"id":5801,"date":"2020-08-31T09:50:33","date_gmt":"2020-08-31T16:50:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/?p=5801"},"modified":"2020-08-31T09:48:35","modified_gmt":"2020-08-31T16:48:35","slug":"this-is-08-31-2020","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/?p=5801","title":{"rendered":"This is\u2026.? \u2013 [08\/31\/2020]"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"Everything here is harsh and bright and violent
\n~ Buffy<\/em><\/p>\n

or<\/p>\n

So you\u2019ll kill them, and then someone else will kill you [\u2026] and so on and so on until everyone is bathed in blood and no one even remembers who [they] were. That\u2019s how blood fueds work Pol. Congratulations, you\u2019re an Arend to your fingertips now<\/em><\/p>\n

~ Polgara the Sorceress.<\/p>\n

Fair warning: I don\u2019t think this is going to be an easy read, I don\u2019t even know that it\u2019s going to make any sense. But something happened recently that I find myself needing to work through and this is the best way I know how to do that\u2026<\/p>\n

I haven\u2019t talked much about touring since I\u2019ve been back, but the tours are<\/em> running. Online ticket sales only, limited numbers, masks where possible, and we\u2019ve all been assigned our own microphones that travel back and forth with us now\u2026but yes\u2026I am back in black and will be for the foreseeable future. For as long as the restrictions allow us to keep running.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a different world out there. I\u2019ve pretty much accepted that. I\u2019ve gotten fairly used to the masks and the distancing and the bubbles. I do my bit as best I can and try not to think about the fact that the situation is probably going to get worse before it gets better.<\/p>\n

The new normal. That\u2019s all fine. I get that.<\/p>\n

But there\u2019s something else\u2026something that I\u2019ve felt more since I\u2019ve stepped back into working in the downtown core.<\/p>\n

Downtown has never felt\u2026great. When I first started the job town was fairly quiet unless you were around the louder bars in the evening, there were a handful of transient people, most of whom our team actually somewhat knew. Several of them knew us by name. There was little turmoil and I was never afraid ever. Except for a teeny tiny lingering fear of the dark when I was on my way home.<\/p>\n

But now?<\/p>\n

The world is a different place now. Those sadly familiar faces are gone, I haven\u2019t seen any of them in seasons \u2013 I hope that\u2026wherever they are\u2026they\u2019re all right, and that they found their way to a better place in life (or a better place in the next life, if it came to that for any of them). In their place is\u2026I don\u2019t know. A world I don\u2019t recognize. The \u201cnew\u201d residents of the downtown streets and the temporary shelters are sometimes frightening in their aggression and tours are \u2013 apparently, it hasn\u2019t happened to me \u2013 being frequently interrupted by a heightened level of harassment by everything from drunks to protests. Some of our tours have had to be re-routed to avoid problematic areas.<\/p>\n

Town feels\u2026strange now. Unfamiliar. I walk streets I\u2019ve known my whole life, tell stories I\u2019ve been telling for over fifteen years, but I sometimes don\u2019t recognize the city I\u2019m telling them in! A few nights ago my early evening tour was interrupted by a protest following around a supposedly (I say supposedly because I couldn\u2019t make out much of what was being said) hate-fueled street preacher. A hate preacher? In my city? And as I watched them pass\u2026it was actually hard to tell which group was more hateful.<\/p>\n

And that frightened me more than a little\u2026<\/p>\n

I remember when protesting against such things took the form of massive silent angel wings blocking them from view at funerals\u2026how did we go from that to\u2026this?<\/p>\n

And it\u2019s not just here. It\u2019s not just this beautiful city of mine that I love so much, it seems to be\u2026everywhere. There are days since I was released from my shipboard \u201cimprisonment\u201d when I don\u2019t even seem to recognize the entire world<\/em>. And this is since\u2026January? Since March?<\/p>\n

What is happening<\/em> to the world out there? I don\u2019t understand it.<\/p>\n

I know and understand that a lot of the problems that are currently and violently raising their heads have been a long long time coming. I am fully aware that I myself am privileged in many many ways, not the least of which is where I was born and the colour of my skin. I am not contesting the issues at hand. I am not standing against<\/em> anything or even for<\/em> anything\u2026I am merely frightened.<\/p>\n

And confused\u2026so very confused\u2026<\/p>\n

Because I don\u2019t remember any of it being like this\u2026and I am afraid of where it will end.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Everything here is harsh and bright and violent ~ Buffy or So you\u2019ll kill them, and then someone else will kill you [\u2026] and so on and so on until everyone is bathed in blood and no one even remembers … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[17],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5801","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reflections-below-the-waterline"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3GtNE-1vz","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5801","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5801"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5801\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5804,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5801\/revisions\/5804"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5801"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5801"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/bloodinyoursaltwater.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5801"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}