I should probably point out that my voice has returned to me. That might be considered rather important after all. It was certainly important to me!
A lot of people – particularly some of my coworkers on board – don’t really understand that primal fear that hits me with total vocal loss. It’s terrifying. It’s like a dancer breaking an ankle, no matter how certain you are that it is going to heal, that it is going to get back to normal, you can’t help but hear your mother’s voice in your head
Be careful with your voice Shaughnessy, take care of it, or one day you’ll open your mouth and it won’t be there.
Singing isn’t just something I do on occasion if people decide to ask me too, it’s almost my daily therapy, and not being able to? Not the easiest thing in the world. I had no problem with not being able to speak – in fact I almost welcomed it because it prevented a lot of people coming to me with problems I couldn’t solve because it would have taken me too long to write out the answers – but not being able to sing? Or even hum? When my belt voice is how I work through really bad days? Not good…
Anyway….
I’m supposed to be singing in the Radio Dinner Theatre that’s coming up in a few weeks. Thankfully, I picked a chart that sits in my alto range, because my top sop range is still pretty weak (apparently I still have a sinus infection, loads of fun there). Much as was the case last year, it’s a chart I’ve never done before so I met with the pianist this afternoon in the midship piano lounge and, peering over his shoulder so I could follow the music – marked my way through it a few times to be sure I was even going to be able to pull it off. We weren’t really sure you see, as it’s a big band tune that has been transcribed into a single piano part (and I mean it was originally for a real big band, the kind they haven’t had on ships in a very very long time if ever) – but as usual, the fellow who does my transcriptions did a fantastic job. This is definitely one I’ll be keeping in my repertoire.
But moreover, it just felt so good to be working again, even half working. I slip into a different world when I sing, everything else just kind of…disappears. And I very much needed that this morning.
Now…we’ll just have to see how the actual show goes…two more rehearsals to go….