Alaska and I have a slightly dysfunctional relationship, hiding out there, somewhere in the rain and cold and winter air is whatever is waiting for me this season. Or perhaps it’s something that’s already going on that’s about to come to fruition, or it could be nothing, it could be that this brief two weeks that I spend here will – for once – bring nothing more than fresh air, spring rain and the chance to refresh my crystal collection.
But somehow, I doubt that.
It never fails, every time I set foot in Alaska something major happens in my life. If ports of call could be paralleled to Tarot cards, Alaska is my version of the Tower:
A tower, build upon a solid rock foundation, is struck by lightning and begins to crumble. The crown of heaven is falling and, removed from its protection, both kind and queen are tumbling to their doom. The picture is one of removal and cleansing of that which has been constricted. The card can symbolize the destruction of ego but may also show physical displacements. The positive aspect is that the bedrock remains, revealing the possibility of seeing ultimate reality freed of artificial constructs. Life defining change.
This place is full of ghosts for me, so so many ghosts, so many memories. When you do this kind of work, every port in the world develops associations, but Alaska? Alaska is tied to the big stuff for me; relationships starting, friendships ending, corners being turned. My ship-board career technically started in San Diego with a month long stay in Mexico, but somehow I never remember that part, to me, the memories all start in Alaska.
For all that, I still love Alaska, the soaring majestic beauty of the place – towering even over our pitiful attempts to commercialize and civilize it, still never fails to take my breath away. It’s still very early in the season, so the usually thronged streets are empty, and there were moments today as I splashed through the rain-soaked streets (this is Ketchikan, it always rains), towards my traditional stop at the candy corner that I could almost have tricked myself into feeling as if I was alone. I had IPM today, and was only sprung from the ship because I arranged a 45 minute time swap with the Culinary Host, and since I didn’t want to be one to go back on my word, I didn’t make it to my usual crystal shop…which is probably for the best, as I have a tendency to buy out the store there, and there will be other chances to stock up on my hematite. Nor did I pay a visit to the hole-in-the-wall bar that Amras and I used to frequent during the last season we were crossing ports here, but that’s not unusual, as it always takes forever for me to find the right dodgy alley 
But still, even though the sun broke through later in the day and drenched the water-slick streets in wavering watery light, I still can’t help but think that somewhere out there, behind the rain, there’s something waiting to happen…
Because somehow…Alaska and I just have this pattern….