Technically we cross the equator tomorrow, but as that date is rightfully reserved for much more important ceremonies – we chose today to welcome his majesty King Neptune to grace our mid-ship pool so that those vile Pollywogs who work among us could be initiated to the lofty heights of the status of trusty shellback.
As always, it was a messy – slightly chaotic – tribute, with many crazy proclamations and many variations of multicoloured slime. What was entertaining for me ws that I was the only one of the ‘medics’ who had performed the service (such as it is) before, so the other five somehow ended up looking to me for random things. Which means I suppose the Pollywogs have me to thank (blame? ) for the fact that the tables got pre-slimed before they even arrived for their treatment.
Hey, if you don’t do that, one whole side of them doesn’t get doused! How unfair would that be? One must be fair with one’s sacrifices after all!
Working our way down through the departments, the squirming ‘victims’ being dragged before Neptune and the ship’s staff in groups of two or three by suitably brutal pirates – we watched the pool get murkier and murkier. While those of our patients who were condemned to be unable to take the plunge baked miserably on the poolside. Every time a pollywog hit the tables, the band kicked into “What do you do with a Drunken Sailor” which made me giggle somewhat insanely.
Finally we reached the entertainment department; and the rest of my team which included my manager. I mean how often do you get to dump slime on your manager?
Just remember Rye, we love you!
And our librarian, who, in a twist of irony ended up on my table – the ex-flagship librarian initializing one of the last librarians to fill the post.
‘Bienne! Eyes closed, mouth shut, I’m sorry!
And we upended the last of the slime bucket over her head.
Shall they sink? Or shall they stink?!
Let ‘em bake!
Hit the drink!
Of course, the final verdict for the final batch of pollywogs doesn’t make much of a difference as – at that point – everyone is ending up in the water, pirates, pollywogs, medics alike. Otherwise there’s no way to wash off the multicolored coating of slime! Incidentally my slime was pink – as were my scrubs, I like to be colour co-ordinate.
But also, granting us safe passage home!
Because hey, better safe than sorry any day!