I got out of the institution on the day of my sister’s wedding. I had started to get used to the place. Breakfast at 8, classes at 2, therapy at 4, and asleep by 10. Inside life was simple
~ Secretary
As I suspected, life goes on. In a strange, start and stop kind of way. The ship is a very strange place to be right now. One thing that is for certain: it teaches me how to be a minority. The vast majority onboard the ship at the moment are Filipino and Indonesian (and they are awesome), so the ship has naturally shifted to fit their cultural tastes – let’s just say I’d best get used to spicy food, because eventually we have got to run out of pasta!
But everyone is very kind and supportive of everyone else. Underneath the somewhat “party like it’s the end of the world” attitude, there is still that uneasy shell-shocked feeling of “when do they let us go home? What are they trying to distract us from? Is my family okay? Do I have to be here forever? What if something happens?”
That never goes away, no matter how cheap the chocolate or the wine or the availability of a pool (and yes, we do have access to the pool).
Amras and I are slowly working out kind of a schedule. The captain wakes the whole ship up with an annoucement at 9am (and it goes into all the cabins so we’re awake whether we want to be or not), and if you want to eat, you’d best be up before that annoucement because breakfast closes at 9am. After that we check in with home and then get a couple of hours work done in the make-shift recording studio we have set up in my office (we’re working on a couple of pretty cool projects right now), and I usually get some sewing done. Then lunch; followed by our daily walk before returning to the studio. At 3 we usually go relax somewhere.
Let’s just say I’m getting a lot of cross-stitch done.
There are evening activities, like movies and karaoke. I teach a class every other day. Most of the crew are in some way still working, even though it’s reduced shifts. We are all desperately trying to find ways to keep busy; because the moment we stop being busy…reality sets back in and you start to feel a little shaky…my stomach knots up and I can feel the tears start to gather behind my eyes. If I don’t stay busy, I’ll start thinking…and thinking right now might not be the greatest thing to do.
But other than being a little bored, a little bit maladjusted and a lot confused, we are all fine out here. We’re lonely, we want to be with (the rest of) our families, but we’re safe. And we still know just how very very lucky we are to be so.
Until next.