It occurred to me today that I have perhaps fifteen books in my cabin…some half-read and partially abandoned (though never totally), some not even touched, at least two or three that are brand new.
Plus my audiobooks…we won’t go into the audiobooks.
*sigh* maybe it’s time to admit two things:
1) I’m lonely. I never fall into the written word quite this much if I’m not.
2) I may have a bit of a problem with books.
*sigh*
Many of my bosses in the past have commented that I need to relax more; one even officially said that I need to learn to give myself a break. As I recall that made my Big Brother chuckle when I passed it on.
She doesn’t realize that that’s just…you?
Not everyone knows me as well as you big brother…
I paraphrase of course, the actual conversation was probably longer and more convoluted than that, but that was the gist of it.
I suppose the long and the short of it is this: I apologize in advance if I grow silent this contract. Some contracts for me are outgoing ones, and some are not. Italy? Italy was an extrovert contract; out in every port, up every night. This season on the flagship? Gearing up to be an introvert one. I find myself with little desire to get off the ship except for brief moments at a time to make sure that I get some fresh air and some vitamin D into my system. I’m sure once we get more along the route into the ports that offer ocean swimming and such I’ll pull myself out of my self-imposed hermitage and venture out into the world again, but for now I find I’ve somewhat drawn into my shell. I would say I’d been hurt in some way to cause it, but nothing springs to mind. I suspect I’m just tired…
I don’t know why it’s taking me so long to settle into my own skin this time. It hardly ever does, but it is. I have long stretches where I’m totally fine, and then long stretches where I’m so far off my game that my game may as well have left the country…
I don’t get it…