Just a moment
One peculiar passing moment
Must it all be either “less or more”
either “plain or grand”
Is it always or? Is it never and?
That’s what woods are for
For those moments in the woods
It’s difficult to really know where to begin these days. There’s so much to say, and yet at the same time there’s so little.
Every day people ask us questions, usually the same ones, always with our best interests at heart, but the truth is we simply don’t have the answers yet. It’s too soon to say whether or not there will even be an industry to go back to let alone whether we will have jobs in it or if we would welcome them back. Just one foot in front of the other, just like everyone else.
I do miss my job. Sometimes. In little odd flashes that I don’t always expect. A song on the radio, a memory flashing through my mind. But I’m also aware that I’ve been away from it a few months now, and that’s enough to start separating myself from the parts I know I don’t miss: the petty politics and the sense of separation, the loneliness and the long hours. But I miss my friends and my shipboard family and the whirlwind seeing of the world.
But that said, I’m not at all unhappy. Not anymore (I was, for a while, but I prefer not to focus on it). Life always takes bizarre turns, and it’s impossible to see what’s around the next corner. True, I’m a little sad that we’re not in Denmark where we were originally supposed to be this month. But…the flips side of that coin is that I have a comfortable routine and people who care about me, I have a roof over my head and someone to come home to who knows how I take my tea and sits across the table from me while I ramble on about my day. I have more energy at the end of the day now than I ever really remember having before.
Shockingly, I seem to have found my feet.
It’s in times like these that I’ve learned to take joy in the little day to day things that are all too easy to miss. The sunshine filtering through the rose bush outside my window. A perfectly formed embroidery pattern. The taste of tea and coffee first thing in the morning. The way my Dad teases me at work. The smile on a little kid’s face when I tell them a ghost story. Throwing a recipe together at the last minute and having it – mostly – turn out. Saturday afternoons with my mother. Watching my Dad fix Amras’ bike pedal. Being home to wish people a happy birthday. Being able to have a lunch date with my best friend and know that I will be there for it. Being able to say yes to dinner invitations. Walks by the water in the evening. Fresh picked, sun-warmed blackberries. Jokes about Canadian geese. Even a perfectly aimed archery shot in my current video game obsession.
These are all things that…I missed while I was away. And having them around, tangible and present, even the bad ones, even the ones that sting – makes everything feel better…more…alive somehow. Those little, day to day things that no one really thinks about because they’re so seemingly unimportant.
Right now? With the world we live in? Everything that brings even a moment of joy seems so very important.
Find those moments.
And when in doubt? Keep being kind.